My hope is that Jesus of Nazareth comes alive more and more to me every single day. Every moment, every second, what would it be like if I thought about this Jewish man, who completely changed the world. A Rabbinic teacher, a friend to the poor, the comforter of the weak, the social advocate, the offensive, uncontainable Jesus from the “wrong part of the tracks” Nazareth. Jesus, the Son of God. At least that’s what Nathanael thought in John's story about this man. Nathanael is completely perplexed. Utterly surprised that anyone of significance, much less the Messiah that would deliver Israel from Exile reinstating God’s rule over all the Kingdoms of the world, would be from a place like Nazareth. Nazareth, that one part of Galilee that no one cared about, much less talked about. And now, all these heralds and all this excitement about a man who up to this point, kept his head down, lived a simple life and most likely helped his dad build things, now is the Messiah King, the Christ. What Nathanael didn’t understand, and what I have a hard time understanding myself sometimes, is that God always likes using people from the most unlikely places. This is the new culture shock of God’s Rule, His Kingdom now available here on earth as it is in His realm (Heaven). Everything is upside down, in reverse, backwards: Hooray! For the people who are poor, can’t pay their bills, and are fully aware and desperate of their need for the living God, they’re the first ones invited to God’s homecoming party (Matthew 5:3). This is what Jesus meant when He spoke the first line of the Beautitudes: God is here, His rule is happening, and oh yeah, the unlikely ones are the ones who are fortunate. But why? Is there some mystic truth about if you are financially poor God favors you more? Is there an automatic virtue that comes with not having much? Not exactly. But what Jesus understood is this: most of the time the people who fit these descriptions are the ones whose hearts are in the right position to receive a Savior and enter the Kingdom of God. These are people who understand there is a need for a Savior in their heart and in the world. This is why God uses unlikely people, rich or poor, articulate or illiterate, competent or not: God is looking for people ready to live for Kingdom standards, whether or not they match up to the world’s standards of success or leadership capability. He is saying that it is usually the unlikely people from the unlikely places who understand this: When you have nothing to lose, you have everything to gain. And that everything is Jesus, the reason for life, the logos. And that Jesus, uses the people and things that people consider “weak” from the most unlikely places as his ultimate vessels, because all He needs is there obedience and a microscopic level of faith and then BOOM! His strength shines out of their weakness, bringing glory to His name, and simultaneously empowering his new disciple to live by faith more and more. That is the brilliant love that Jesus displays and offers to all of the people with hearts of desperation that He comes across.
So as I figure out how to be human, God's image-bearing human, not the alien flesh that I've convinced myself fits me, I am called to encounter this Jesus who saves. I haven't written a blog in a long time because I've been in a season of amazing deconstruction. I've been allowing this Jesus of Nazareth to invade my life and every now and then allowing Him to tear Sheridan apart, so that the holes that are left shine with His Light and His Spirit. And one day, that alien suit I wear, will be no more..
But sometimes, there is an accuser, this being most notably called The Satan who bugs me...and every now and then, he likes to play a highlight reel of all of the things I've done wrong and continue to do wrong. The people I've hurt and the insecurities and emotional bruises and the horrific consequences of sin all done by my hand. My response? I usually weep. I think about people I've hurt and consider the affordability of a supernatural time travel machine. But the Spirit makes me remember. Hear that, the Spirit makes me remember. He won at that cross, I don't have to live in shame. I am set free from the shame the enemy wants me to live in, and now live in the power of Grace that was given when he defeated death and evil on the cross. I have decided to remember where my Father's House is and allowed His Spirit to guide the way. Repentance, a remembering of what it means to turn and be human once again. So if you have a voice that feels like it should be silent, either because you've done too much bad, or not enough good, the victory has been won. Don't believe that lie from an accuser. Jesus loves you and likes you, and most of the time this is the theological concept that we struggle with the most. Truly I tell you, if you believe that God can no longer use you, ask to hear people's stories. Ask to hear mine, because that's not the kind of God we serve. Too bad to be redeemed? Too messed up to be God's messenger? Unlikely. Very, very unlikely.